My kind of 10 May

Today is a public holiday. I woke up on 11 am because last night was a tiring day for me. Joining a singing competition for Dusun language is hard. Pronunciation and everything. Just too tired. So, I just laying on my bed and sit in front of my laptop all day is quite relaxing for me at least. I know my eyes is sleepy all the time because of this kind of routine. I still haven't check if any assignment need to be done this week. I just too tired of everything. I did tell you guys before that I had boyfriend. That boyfriend became my ex for almost 5 years now I guess. I'm kind of in shock when I saw his name appeared on my Instagram story line. I bet he's curious about what's going on in my life now. since he just broke up with his latest girl *evil laugh* I know I shouldn't be laughing but I can't help myself from it. Sorry. I know I'm being mean but serves his right. Past few years, I was the who ended the relationship because he's being a jerk. After that, I never looked back and choose to forget things. I'd cut my hair short and entered University. I felt so good and I'm proud to say that I'm be able do live without him. Today, I felt a bit strange. Seems like my heart says that I should give him another chance. Is it worthy? or is it because I feel lonely? I'm so confused. As much as I hate him, I never wanted to forget him. Some people might say remember bad things that he already done towards you. Yes, being with him always make me felt insecure about my body. He did love me but not the whole me. When I thought about it, I never wanted to face the same problem as the old days. He had a lot of flaws but so do I am.  I choose the accept and embrace his flaw while him keep asking me to change and become someone else. Why? I'm just so disappointed. As a young Gloria back on 2009, she just want to be beautiful she goes but he doesn't find that I' beautiful in my on way. Choices can always be made, the most importantly be wiser.