Mentally breakdown.

I thought after sending the letter, everything will be alright. But turned out to be, I can't do nothing about it. No matter how hard I'd pray about it still nothing that I can do.This semester is the worst ever and felt disappointed about myself. I never be this worst and I never such thing like escaping class, end up meeting my head department and being scolded by my lecturer. Somehow, from this moment it really thought me how to grow mature. Second year it's just a beginning to feel all the stress. Now, I understand what it's like when you are mentally breakdown and some people might end up suicide. But, for me suicide is not a proper way or it's never a way for people to think when they are having problem. Frankly, I never want to be like this. Maybe, I'm just too far from my home. I'm an independent kid since when I can remember but being away from my family it's just a bit hard. Some people might think that to further study and being away from your family is a great opportunity to be freedom and trying to live independently with stranger. For me, it's not that great. I hate being adult where all thing you need to think and you'll need to be independent. Perhaps, I'm just too young to be a person who's facing the problem alone or I'm just being hypocrite and keep running away from my problems. Wish me the best of luck. Hopefully this will end sooner than I thought.